Happy 84th Birthday Willie Nelson

Hope he’s having a Willie nice birthday.

In honor of the red headed strangers birthday we are sharing some of his favorite jokes. Back in 2012 Willie published a joke book  “Roll Me Up and Smoke Me When I Die.” Here are some of the more cleaner jokes. Who knew Ol’ Willie was such a comedian. If these don’t make you chuckle you might not be from Texas.

It was Christmastime and the lady answered the door. It was the postman. She said, “come in, I have something for you.” She took him to the bedroom and screwed his brains out, then fixed him a nice big breakfast of biscuits, gravy, ham and eggs. Then she walked him to the door, gave him a dollar, and said “Merry Christmas.”

The postman said “Lady, what just happened?” She said, “I asked my husband what to give you for Christmas, and he said ‘screw him, give him a dollar.’ Breakfast was my idea.”

A drunk went into the bar and asked another drunk what time it was. The first drunk looked at his watch and said, “It’s thirteen o’clock.” The second drunk said, “My God, let’s get out of here, it’s later than it’s ever been!”

A guy went to the doctor for a checkup. The doctors said, “Well, first of all, sir, you’ll have to stop masturbating.” The guy said “Why?” The doctor said, “So I can examine you!”

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